Here Comes the Single Girl!

Today I’m heading to a wedding. A beautiful, spring wedding.

And as I prepare for it (currently basking in the glory of the sun as I type this blog) I think about the bride-to-be. Right now there is a woman I don’t know (I’m going as my friend’s date) who is preparing for this extra special day. She’s probably had her manicure and pedicure already, done her hair and makeup, fought with her bridesmaids a couple of times and had several mini-nervous breakdowns. Kind of makes me wonder what my special day would/will be like.

What surprises me though is how much I don’t wonder about “that day” anymore. When I was in my early twenties I figured I would have been married for years by now. Probably even have squeezed out a couple of kids. Now I’m far more content to squeeze into my size 25 jeans since my pelvis hasn’t been ravished by a screaming infant. I still prefer happy hours at a bar to “napping hours” on the couch, as married couples are prone to enjoy. Will I ever grow up?

In truth I was never that type of girl. Never rummaged through bride magazines, don’t have my perfect dress picked out, haven’t synthesized that amazing venue in my head complete with 5,000 flowers, white doves and puffy bridesmaid dresses. In fact, the thrifty cynic in me cringes at the thought of spending $50 a head to serve dry chicken marsala to a bunch of people I don’t even really know. Wouldn’t that money be better suited on a $50 bottle of pinot at some distant and decadent spot in the Polynesian Islands?

Anyway, I’m definitely not trying to ruin this girl’s special moment. Kudos to you, soon-to-be-married couple! And the rest of you, please keep having weddings that I can attend. It’s an excuse for me to pull out that gorgeous dress that’s just too fancy otherwise, dance the night away, eat ridiculous amounts of food and drink copious amounts of champagne. All as a perfectly content single gal.

If I ever do get married though, I will only do so under the condition that one of these be my cake topper:

My Inner Animal

So I finally had the opportunity to load the pictures I took from the zoo the other day.  Funny how much some of the animals were able to strike a pose that reminds of myself at some point during my routine activities.  

Here's me when I first come out of the shower from washing my hair.  Yes people, my natural hair is a mix between Mufasa and Weird Al Yankovic.

And here I am after work with my roommate, watching American Idol.  I'm the one with the large posterior propped up in the air for no reason.

And look, this is exactly how I feel today after eating far too many Panera Bread sandwiches and cookies for our office celebration.  Give or take a few extra....parts.

This I found to be just a cool picture.  I'll say this is me warding off losers from my ridculous world of online dating. 

But so far, all joking aside, this has to be my absolute favorite.  It's just a pretty scene, one that gives me that warm fuzzy feeling and makes me happy (without laughing my ass off because I'm making fun of something).  I guess it reminds me most of family; of what I have and all I have to be grateful for.

Aww!!!  Go give the ones you love a hug for me!!!  :-D

Let's Try Champion Ballroom!

First night of Belly Dance at Champion Ballroom!  Super cute little studio.  I really want to see what they have to offer in the way of latin dance classes.  And get this....they're having a showcase performance on May 25th!  Obviously the goal is to butter up the teacher enough and wow her with my alluring shimmys so she'll allow me to participate this late in the game. 

Unfortunately at this time I think I may have frightened the poor teacher when I asked to set up my camera and tape the class for What's Next.  She was less than warm to me for the duration of the hour, only giving me the semblance of a smile when I assured her the tape would not end up on YouTube.  She'll like me though, eventually, if I can keep going back.  Money talks man.

So unfortunately I cannot keep my promise of posting a tape of class this time.  I'll try again when I can return to my regular studio A Time to Dance in Northpark.  However, I did manage to take a couple of pictures of my get-up after class.

Mind you, those abs WILL be a six pack.  Someday.  Fingers crossed.

The $5 Question

In an effort to completely forget about the Big Huh and all of his minions (a.k.a. the men I’ve met just like him), I’ve decided to turn myself into an exercise guru. I’m trading my evenings laden with happy hour margaritas to days filled with multiple workout routines. Sunday: 3 hours at the zoo walking up and down hills burning 525 calories. Monday: 1 hour aerobic hip-hop class burning 338 calories. Tuesday: 1 hour of cycling burning 390 calories. Also on Tuesday: 4 mile lunch walk burning another 290 calories. Tonight: belly dancing at Champion Ballroom burning a bunch of calories. Yes folks, I’m in “gonna exercise that man right outta my hair” mode.
And yet I can’t help but still wonder, what the hell happened? What made him disappear so randomly? Did my hair fall flat? Did I stumble into some bad lighting? What’s wrong with me?

Regardless, I really shouldn’t care, right? I’ve said my prayers to the Universe and I just need to trust that this is the correct path for me at this time. However, it’s kind of hard to trust that “everything happens for a reason” and just mosey on along when you are a self-obsessed, neurotic, control freak who needs answers for everything that goes on in life. Like me!

So if there’s anyone out there who can let me know what makes people flip the switch, anyone at all who knows what turns people from enthralled and attentive to complacent and non-existent from one day to the next, I will gladly and loudly proclaim you a God among men.

Or I’ll give you $5. You pick.

Ok....

The last post wasn't one of my finest.  A recipe resulting from a dash of bitterness and one too many margaritas.  Today though, as I returned home from my parents house and picked again at nails (a habit since birth), I was reminded again of the Big Huh.  He's once looked perfect on me,  but like my manicure he is chipping and fading away.  And when the polish on my nails begins to fade, I don't cry and vow never to wear nailpolish again.  I realize that's just the way things go, remove the old crusty polish and slap on a new coat. 

So this time I want to keep an open mind.  I don't want to curse the day I ever dated anyone and sink into a tantrum of epic proportions, causing me to repeat the cycle again in a few months when I've forgotten how disappointed I felt.  This kind of thinking only stunts the process and I don't learn a damn thing.  And each person we encounter was put here to allow us to learn and experience something, even if it's not the experience you necessarily wanted to have.

I'm still done with online dating for awhile.  I'm gaining weight from all the happy hour food during the week and let's face it, that's definitely not going to help me date more in the future!  But I'm not done dating.  And I'm not giving up.  I'm just going to have to trust the Universe has something else in store for me for the time being.  I have one question Universe:

What's next?